Communication is key in any relationship, but there’s one question — and specifically a time when this question is posed — that is one big relationship no-no. Guys, listen closely. Do not, immediately after finishing yourself, ask your significant other or sexual partner if they came. You might be genuinely concerned for their pleasure. It’s easy to get defensive here. But given even extra second for some thought, that’s not how it comes across to her. Empirical data shows what we already knew from popular culture and stand up comedy from the 1980s and 90s: there’s an orgasm gap. In fact, recent studies show that men orgasm during sexual encounters a whopping 95% of the time while women only reach orgasm on 65% of those occasions. So, now you’re saying to yourself, and me, the anonymous (to you anyway) writer, that’s why we ask, right? To make sure they got there, because you know how less common it is.